If you ask a medical doctor what depression is, most will tell you that it is a chemical imbalance in the brain. I would argue that depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain that is usually caused by a specific set of behaviors.
Most people repress the vast majority of their emotions. After they've done that long enough, those repressed emotions start leaking out all over the place. They have to go somewhere. Many people take those leaking emotions and direct them at other people. The people who do this are not usually very pleasant to be around. Angry, unpredictable, and mean-spirited is how they usually are. A lot of people refuse this path however. They push those leaking emotions down even harder, so that they won't leak out onto others. This is a noble sentiment. But it's also a common cause of depression. Those emotions junk up the emotional processing system, leaving the person with a ton of emotion inside and no way to get it out.
For those people, there is good news. Your depression is completely curable. But, of course, there is also bad news. The bad news is that it will take a lot of work. All you need to do is get your emotional processing system working again. To do this, cry every day. Some days, cry all day. It might take years. I know. That sounds ridiculous. How am I supposed to live if I cry all the time? Right? I understand, but ask yourself this: Am I really living now? My guess is that you are not. If not, the sooner the better.
Eventually, after you've become an expert on crying, your awareness about your emotions will start to really develop. You'll feel your emotions as soon as they occur and you'll express them right away also. And if something prevents you from expressing right away, you'll be angry about it. And then you'll have to learn how to handle that too. But you'll do it. And, over time, you'll become a person who has emotions instead of a person who is dominated by their emotions. And, from personal experience, I can tell you that that is a wonderful, wonderful thing.
Good luck to you.
This makes a ton of sense to me.
ReplyDeleteYou can apply the same concepts to more than just depression - for example, marital affairs. Our typical response is to tighten all our muscles and try even harder to muster the resolve not to stray (another way of pushing down emotions) - but that doesn't actually address the emotions and chain of behaviors that led to the "problem" in the first place.
Obviously, a small percentage of people don't consider straying a problem at all, but if you say you're not going to do something, and then you do - that's a problem worth exploring.
Patrick Foley, you are seriously awesome. Thank you for this comment.
DeleteYes, the "tighten(ing) all our muscles" is using will-power, an important tool. However, most people over-rely on will-power. Once we get to that point, the only recourse left is to continue to tighten our muscles, forever. It just doesn't work. If instead, we learn to express our emotions as they occur, will-power becomes a tool used only occasionally, when appropriate. Not all the time. It's the same issue with any addiction: alcohol, food, drugs, sex, gambling, on and on and on. If you try to will your way to stopping, you're in trouble. You must express your emotions!
Oh, and Patrick, your comment was the 100th comment on my blog. You win nothing, except my gratitude for your participation. So, thank you.
DeleteMarcus-
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree with you more about this blog. Projection of our unprocessed "shit" is prevalent in the world we live in today. Sometimes it's as if that's all we're doing with one another. Not many are being brutally honest with themselves. Thank God we have unhealthy food, booze, cigarettes, gambling, incessant need to be busy all the time, shopping, TV, etc. This list can go on forever. Whatever we can do to avoid facing our true self (soul) we jump on it with a smile. Until one day we wake up to the fact that we've being lying to ourselves for a long time now and so has our culture. Wow, what a realization to have. Similar to neo learning about the matrix in the movie the matrix. We've abandoned our emotions for far too long now. We're collectively yearning to reconnect with our souls and journey back to the Divine. The way to begin this journey is to start doing your inner work. Being able to express and process our emotions in a healthy manner and as they arise is essential to our journey back to our souls. We all feel this calling inside of ourselves, for some it is faint and for others it is crazy loud. Now it's time to listen to that voice inside that never gives up trying to get our attention. Let's express together in a loving and compassionate way. Others will see this from the outside looking in and will start to make changes themselves. This is how we're going to create the future we all hope for.
Thank you
That is excellent stuff Chad. Thank you so much for reading and commenting. I agree that, "The way to begin this journey is to start doing your inner work." That's part of why I write this blog, to help facilitate that for people. I also think spending time in direct contact with nature is another important thing to do to begin the journey.
DeleteFor anyone else reading this comment, Chad is doing amazing things in the world in relation to emotions. Hooray! I'll be writing a post soon that will talk about what he's doing.
Thanks again, Chad.